


Jaehyun's Juliet

by peachsenpai (Jungwolf)



Category: NCT (Band), SEVENTEEN (Band), WAYV, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, I don't even know how to tag halp, Implied/Referenced Incest, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-11
Updated: 2019-10-10
Packaged: 2020-01-11 09:19:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18427640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jungwolf/pseuds/peachsenpai
Summary: To Jaehyun, Juliet looked a little something like someone with fluffy candy hair, bright eyes and kissable lips. To Jaehyun, Juliet looked a little something like Lee Taeyong.





	1. z e r o||lips like cherry

**Author's Note:**

> this is available on my aff under the username peachsenpai... I guess I'm posting it here because I remembered I own an ao3 account...

   


Never in a million years would Jaehyun have thought that he would fall for someone else.  

His hair was a pretty shade of pink and peach, like cotton candy. He wasn't dressed for the ocassion, he wrapped his arms around himself as he was clad in a thin oversized white shirt, see-through almost. Jaehyun mentally scolds himself for inviting him over on such short notice, he must've been an angel to have obliged to his selfish request. Despite that, he acquainted himself with the evening breeze as he felt the wind on the balcony, under the starry night.  

Jaehyun walked upto the candy haired boy, taking light steps so as to not startle him, uttering whatever it is that he could because being nervous is something he hasn't experienced in a long time. What if the ‘boy’ didn'tnt want his privacy invaded? Whatever he did he couldn't look away. His back, just his back seemed ethereal. 

Propping his arms on the railing, he turned to him. His side profile was something that Jaehyun wouldn't be able to get out of his mind for days to come or perhaps, till he was no longer able to think. He gave him butterflies, savage butterflies. 

Jaehyun busied himself with his phone whilst stealing glances of the boy who seemed to enjoy ‘stargazing’ to the extent that the cold night did not seem to bother him, and neither did his presence. 

“They're pretty aren't they?” he spoke, and Jaehyun's ears have been graced. “They are”. 

Jaehyun didn't know he was standing so close to him, he only realised when their arms brushed a little. “Happy Birthday” he said holding his hand out, a tiny parcel on his palm. 

He made sure he wore his best smile and the latter mirrored it, features softly highlighted by the moonlight.  

Having accepted his generous gift, he felt the need to thank him. He removed his jacket and put it around the shorter male. His bangs swayed to the light wind, folded softly on his temples right above his eyes which were fluttered close as Jaehyun's own widened. 

His plush lips were pressed against his for a brief moment, before pulling away and turning to leave. Coming to his senses, he reached out to grab his hand. 

“Wait...” 

“It was nice to meet you... I'm Taeyong” 


	2. o n e||his juliet

' Sometimes I feel used and thrown away but I prefer dealing with it myself, the helplessness, the pain, the anxiety because in the end the only one I can count on is me’

 

Taeyong was  shrivelled up in a corner of a dark and eerie room. His back was covered in red marks, face soaked in salted beads, a blank expression privalent. His hands were cuffed, wrists turning purple from all the struggle. He was chained to the bed nearby. He had already given up all hope.

 

' It's cold it's so cold… I can't…  feel anything’

 

_The door creaks open, light filtering into the room. He doesn't have to look, he already knows who it is. He hears a few heavy thuds nearing him before being harshly yanked by his hair and forced to look at her._

 

_"Have I been a g-good boy?”_

 

_She crouched beside the limp figure and grinned maliciously. She caressed his bruised cheek, brushing the stray locks from his eyes that housed nothing but fear. His ailing self was pulled into her ironic but motherly embrace as she pecked and stroked his hair gently._

 

_“Yes, yes you have Taeyong, you've been a very very good boy, eomma couldn't be more proud of you”_

 

_Taeyong broke out into sobs, he couldn't remember what affection was, was what he was experiencing 'affection’? It felt nice and he leaned into her touch._

 

_“Now now Taeyong, don't go bawling, you know eomma loves you right?”_

 

_There was another person in the room with them, Taeyong had noticed by now. “And Taeyongie, you have a visitor”_

 

Taeyong shot up from the bed, chest heaving up and down in irregular motions, forehead covered  in a sheen of sweat just as  if he had run a marathon. 'Calm down Taeyong it was just a dream… it was just a dream you've left everything behind…’ he chanted till his breathing settled. He was  frightened. He looked around but there was no one there. At times like these he wished Johnny was here with him. As selfish as it sounded, he missed his touch, the comfort in his arms, his voice that told  him 'everything was  going to be okay’, he wished he had never left him alone because he 'promised'- he promised that he would  stay by his side but he was gone and Taeyong felt miserable and 'lonely'.

 

He brought his knees to his chest and pulled sheets around himself.

 

“Maybe I started to depend too much on him… the problem with getting too comfortable or too close to someone is that… when they go away you just... feel... lost.”

 

Taeyong didn't move an inch, he just stayed there, fragments of his forgotten past spreading like venom, enveloping him completely. He despised his pitiful self, how he tended to walk away from his problems and hole up in a corner, how he put up an image of being someone strong, how he internally craved for affection.

 

'...The only one I can depend on is me’

 

Jaehyun was what you would call an unhealthy and aimless 19 year old stepping into adulthood. If he weren't recuperating from an illness he wouldn't be staying  home-not that he dilligently attended his lectures in the first place.

 

He greeted the elders in the park as he walked alongside a few chattering children and smiled lightly  to himself. Kids were so innocent, exhibiting vibrance and energy everywhere they went. It made Jaehyun want to revert back to being a child again. Everything used be be so big and exciting, allthemore reason to look forward to a new day. But a part of him doesn't want to go there. His childhood wasn't all fun and sunshine unlike most, there were some events better left buried in the forgotten depths of his mind.

 

The cold morning air smelled sweet, a little bit of the grass, a little bit of the wild flowers. To think that his mind was filled only with depressing thoughts added weights to his already heavy shoulders, burdening his tiny heart even more. Jaehyun let out a deep sigh, somewhat lifting his damp spirit to some degree.

 

His mind strayed to thoughts he never thought he could think-pleasant thoughts… dark thoughts. He began humming melodies, when he sang his mind stopped thinking and it soothed him but to what extent? The moment he stopped for a millisecond, all the disturbing thoughts returned.

 

The children were gone- they had gone back home, linking hands with their  mothers; so were the other people he saw along the way but he continued to walk deeper into the more lonelier side of the park where there was a lake, because he knew for a fact that 'he’ would be there.

 

The first time he saw him, he wasn't sure if he was real because who has a perfect face, almost as if he was particularly favoured and blessed by the Gods themselves? Human art was what he was, it was as if his face was sculpted carefully, executed flawlessly by hands that painted the skies at sundown, every strand of hair intricately woven, eyes clear as glass, capable of reflecting his own being, he resembled a delicate fragile angel whose wings had been clipped off for whatever unknown reason. His face looked so serene yet an unexplainable sadness shone in his eyes.

 

As their gazes met Jaehyun bowed, the latter returning the gesture. They never did talk, silence privaled in the space between them, each one of them quietly contemplating, meditating, introspecting. Before leaving they would bow once again and turn their separate ways.

 

Jaehyun didn't know what was so interesting about standing there and staring off into open space, it wasn't fun neither was it productive in any way but it gave him a peace of mind and he liked the stranger's company.

 

After what felt like a really long time of doing nothing, Jaehyun decides that he's going to befriend this boy, they might as well exchange names and numbers after visiting the same place for so long without as much as saying a small thing such as ‘hi’ and he'd like to keep it that way if it weren't for his giddy and impulsive subconscious self doing things to embarrass no one else but himself.

 

“The weather's nice today… do you like the rain?”

 

Jaehyun wants to jump into the lake at this point, because not only was his desired response delayed but he might've just ruined everything, maybe he would even stop coming here. The thought itself gave Jaehyun goosebumps.

 

“I don't hate… the rain… it's not like I like it in any way either”

 

Jaehyun is glad, at least he wasn't repulsed by him. “May I ask why?” he said, being the curious child that he is, brushing off the possibility that it could prove an insensitive question to the latter.

 

“Why I wonder… maybe it's because I lost someone important on a rainy day”

 

“I'm sorry to hear that-”

 

“It's alright, people come and go, it's a part of life… have you ever lost someone important to you?” He said, eyes fixated on him. Jaehyun's breath hitched, his heart tightened around his ribcage. ‘Have I ever lost someone important… have I?’ Jaehyun questioned himself. He hadn't thought about it, at least not in a long time. Blurred memories and images were all that were left of what could've been a beautiful relationship.

 

“I have… lost someone important to me” he answered half-heartedly. The older seemed to be content with the reply.

 

“In that context, we have mutual understanding then. Johnny, his name was Johnny…” he paused “He didn't judge me, even though I was a burden he didn't push me away… I was never able to thank him properly… return the gratitude” there were foreign emotions overflowing in his rather monotone speech. Jaehyun wanted to say something but the words wouldn't come out.

 

He once again faced him, this time there was loneliness painted in his pleading eyes. “Do you think he'll come back? Do you think Johnny will come back?” His fists were clenched, his emotions not wavering in the slightest.

 

Jaehyun was speechless, even if he had something to say he wouldn't say it unless it was in any way optimistic but sparking false hope in him… was wrong right?

 

“I-I don't know…”

 

“You're right… the possibilities that he'd return are close to zero… thank you for listening”

 

Jaehyun couldn't process what happened, he stood dumbfounded, till he remembered what he had  in mind that day.

 

“Will I see you here… again tomorrow?” Jaehyun scratched the back of his neck nervously.

 

He smiled, that  heart-breakingly pure and beautiful smile and began walking on the opposite direction.

 

He never asked him what his name was in the end. He was disheartened by the fact that they didn't exchange names (or numbers for that matter) he was however determined to wait for the day when he willingly introduced himself to him but until then… until then he would call him his ‘Juliet’. No one else had to know, it would be his little secret.


	3. t w o||hologram

Apart from the fact that he was an introvert and wasn't really close to his family members, there was nothing much to his childhood or he just wanted to ‘forget’ all the memories tied to it, and he did. Nostalgia was almost too far out of reach, or it was within his grasp but he chooses not to reach for it- he refused to have it all come back to him. It was better that way.

 

Jaehyun sighed as he lay on his bed that night reaching his hand out to… nothing. There was only the ceiling above him and that too he couldn't reach- this however was, if completely not out of reach was within his grasp, if only he'd have the courage to take a risk and leap in. But what exactly would he accomplish by touching the ceiling? It was as absurd as any other thing he could think of, while in a constant claustrophobic state.

 

The uneasiness wound around him and he tried to ignore it, he tried but somehow felt it. With the lights turned off and the space within the four walls of his room covered in almost pitch black darkness, the silence making its very generous contributions to the charmingly eerie atmosphere, “Hello anxiety” he breathed, and laughed sarcastically. The giddiness ate him up and he took sharp breaths every now and then almost as if he had trouble breathing. Jaehyun has never been good with the dark.

 

The digital clock read ‘03:59’ and he's honestly not even surprised anymore, at this point he doesn't even know what he's anxious about, not that anxiety had any reason to come by, and it still did every night. And it did have a reason to stay too.

 

It's a weekday and he hasn't slept for the life of him. He is, however still expectant that he would somehow fall asleep, if not he would probably chug a gallon of coffee down before he goes out the door. He needs to stay awake, get through the day somehow, as he always does, barely scraping through. He looks at the clock and sighs again, louder this time the exasperation clear in his voice. ‘What’s on your mind Jaehyun?’ he questioned himself. And something flashed in front of his eyes, pink hair, porcelain skin, doll like, there was no denying his perfection but he had this scar, he noticed and it only added to his charms.

 

And then absentmindedness.

 

He falls asleep to thoughts of the stranger which he forces upon himself, it is the only pleasant thing he can think of. Stranger being a term not too suitable, he settles with acquaintance because they weren't really friends. He only wishes they were.

 

And he dreams too of that pretty face.

 

He feels lighter as his eyelids rolled up to the all too familiar ceiling he has been seeing for the past year, but on this morning it seemed less eerie and fairly easier to look at- to wake up to and he wonders why. The air felt less dense and he could breathe easy.

 

The day flies by as it normally would. Uneventful. As usual. Things become difficult to cope with, or even drag on when all it had been is but pictures of black and white, laden with dust.

 

He blames it on his childhood.

 

He was back to college, he was all healthy now, there was no reason for him to stay home and contemplate, though contemplating was something he'd done almost every day without fail, there was no time, or place, or anything that he would not contemplate about.

 

In those three days that he withdrew himself, he wonders what happened, that was different. Because even though it was all still the same, there was something a little different, perhaps it was sufficient rest that he's had in a while or was he over thinking It was ‘him’ perhaps. He breathes out, a small smile tugging the corners of his lips. The thought of him always warmed him up somehow. Even though, even though he was always sad.

 

‘Always sad…?’

 

He wouldn't exactly know, he's only seen him thrice, the only reason he'd visited the park would be because he'd expected him to be there and he always was.

 

“Jaehyun?”

 

No response.

 

“Jaehyun?”

 

The call of his name was faint, like a mirage, it feels shockingly real, but isn't. The hall was empty, and he could be hallucinating. He never did well with crowds, socializing in general. And the effect stayed. The grueling feeling of uneasiness until he was left by himself again. He’s always the last one to leave the lecture halls, it was convenient to not have to bump into bodies unnecessarily. Unheeded apologies made him feel unsecure about himself. As if the mere act of making unintentional physical contact with them was a crime and he was gravely guilty. He doesn’t know how to deal with people, the very least he does is offer a smile. He was told that smiling was contagious, was it not? But his was a constipated one, unoriginal, one worn out of insecurity.

 

The lecture on [insert topic] had been interesting to say the least and he quite happily obliged to spend some extra time finishing up and making sense of the notes that he had taken.

 

Then there was a pat to his shoulder, and that familiar call again. He turns his head almost instantly, blinking his eyes rapidly, call it reflex. It was Ten.

 

“ I… I was over thinking.”

 

He admits, smiling up at him, flashing his dimples. And he smiles back.

 

“Are you okay? I'm worried.”

 

He flashes another smile and nods.

 

“Then what were you thinking about, hmm Jaehyunnie?”

 

He sits on his desk, casually folding his legs, one over the other as he leaned in, caressing his cheek gently, gaze looming over his now flushed face.

 

He retracts.

 

“Jae, you're flushed all the way up to your ears…”

 

“I know…”

 

Jaehyun dips his head, the colour red spreading throughout. He tries to hide his face in his hand but Ten catches hold of his wrist.

 

“Ten… we're not exactly dating anymore… ”

 

“I know… ”

 

He repeated Jaehyun’s words from before, and the words spoke every emotion he wanted to convey, as if he knew the fact that they weren't together anymore, and that there were restrictions as to what he was allowed to do and what he was not, but his body spoke a language of its own. He traces his thumb along his cheekbones, Jaehyun breathes in ragged breaths, intimacy had always scared him. Ten’s body language always told a thousand stories that his usual chatter could never hint and maybe that was what intrigued Jaehyun in the first place.

 

Ten’s fingers now brushed over his closed eyes. The feel of calloused pads, a soothing touch trailing down his cheekbones. His hand, then caressing his cheek gently.

 

“I missed you… Jae… I don't expect you to but… I just wanted to let you know.”

 

From the way that his breath fanned over his skin, his face was only inches away. He knew what would follow.

 

A soft pair of lips fall on his that mould perfectly, right into place like it belonged there. The kiss was slow and sensual as compared to their usual make out sessions, as if Ten wanted to take his time and taste his lips for as long as possible. Jaehyun hesitantly returns the gesture, moving his lips in sync with Ten’s. It'd been so long, it'd been forever since he was this close to anyone, and his kisses quickly grew desperate.

 

A part of him wants to stop, another part of him wants to keep going. He was countervailed by strong appalling emotions.

 

Ten's hands slide onto his shoulder and Jaehyun's around his waist.

 

Kun walks in on the pair, he would clear his throat to get their attention but he thought otherwise and left them there.

 

Jaehyun unwinds his arms, pulling away he didn't look at Ten, he couldn't.

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

Ten purses his lips, reminicising on the remnants of Jaehyun’s lips, the warmth, the subtle taste of his chap stick. He laughs at Jaehyun’s apology. He didn’t regret what he had done. And to his dismay, it showed too well.

 

“Don’t apologise… I was the one who kissed you first.”

 

He slides his bottom off the desk, getting on his feet, nervously straightening the creases on his jeans, an obvious shade of deep red centering his own cheeks. It lifted him a little even though he had known that Jaehyun was hesitant and that he would make something else of it later. The only argument he would have was “I couldn’t help it.” And truth be told, he couldn’t.

 

“Come on, the boys are waiting for us outside.”

**Author's Note:**

> I guess you've figured by now how bad I am at tagging ... I can't even properly write a disclaimer or a description for that matter... also it's probably too late to say this but English isn't my first language and with that said grammatical errors are a given. I would really appreciate it if you would point them out though!! Happy reading!!


End file.
